myspace layouts, myspace codes, glitter graphics

Thursday, August 26, 2010

Excerpt from 42

I found this excerpt and had to laugh... then share it with you. It's from "Extra Virgin Olive Girl"

THE TONYS
I was sitting, eating popcorn, on the couch when Ma came in and plopped down beside me. I was in the middle of watching the Tony Awards and suddenly realized I was not going to enjoy any more of it.
Oooh! Is that Doogie Howzer?” Mom almost squealed with girlish glee when she recognized the host.
“Neil Patrick Harris? Yeah, he’s hosting it this year.”
“He was such a bright young doctor. Remember that time you saw him on Broadway? You should have married him.”
“You do realize he’s not really a doctor?”
“Of course I do. I’m just saying he’s smart enough, he could have been one.”
“What?”
“He was so smart, always spouting those big words and getting all those people better. I’m just saying not many actors can pull that off.”
“You realize half the actors in Hollywood have played doctors.” I didn’t want to have to explain the definition of acting to her.
“Yes, but George Clooney and John Stamos are too old for you.” Of course, in my mom’s mind there were only four actors in Hollywood: George Clooney, John Stamos, Neil Patrick Harris, and Leonardo DeCaprio… sometimes there was Brad Pitt, but he didn’t really count in her mind since he’d become more of an activist. I should have known better and stopped the conversation right then.
“You do know Neil Patrick Harris is gay, right?” But Ma wouldn’t hear of this.
“Nonsense, doll, you say all these Broadway actors are gay.”
“That’s because they are!”
“Doll, if you don’t want to marry an actor, I understand. I mean they are prettier than you, but you don’t have to go around slandering them.” And at that, I just rolled my eyes and dropped the conversation. There was no winning this. I vowed that any further conversations that might follow that path would only be met with popcorn stuffed in my mouth.

No comments: